Don’t Wait For Life To Come At You

You are in danger of living a life so comfortable and soft, that you will die without ever realizing your true potential.

David Goggins, Can’t Hurt Me

Are you at a place in your life where the above quote rings a bell? Is there a nagging thought in your head that goes like this?

“My life is meant to be more…”

Do you feel a bit overwhelmed though because you’re not quite sure what to do?

I understand completely what that is like. I’ve been there. I know how impossible it can all feel. I understand how weak it can make you seem to yourself.

You are not weak, though, and change is possible. Will you keep reading to know more? I hope so.

The problem with growth, healing, and, ultimately, becoming who we are meant to be is…

…fear.

It’s one hell of a roadblock. 

Fear of not knowing where or how to start. Fear of what might change because of the change required. Fear of having to deal with things being run away from. Fear of losing things or someone you’ve been holding on to for too long.

It’s hard and scary, but as the quote above at the top of this post insinuates…

…do you want to live your entire life missing out on your true potential?

I drank for a really long time to avoid all of this. Alcohol was fun at first in college, but at twenty-four I started self-medicating when I suffered a tragically emotional event. 

There was so much grief, guilt, and shame wrapped up in it, and with no one to talk to, I turned to alcohol. It became my best friend and numbing agent for thirteen years.

And then 2014 came along where I lost my mom to pancreatic cancer in less than six months and became a father a little over three months after she died. 

I became a parent while losing a parent.

The truth is this duality broke me. Even in the face of being a new father, I was drowning in grief. Not only that, but my unnamed alcoholism was almost quite literally drowning me as well.

Grief and alcohol. 

There is only one way that that dangerous combo can go which is down.

I hit rock bottom in June of 2015 and that is when I realized that life was forcing me to change.

I’ll spare you extensive details about my journey between then and now. You can learn more about how my self-growth and healing journey began, but in essence…

  • I befriended my grief
  • Dealt with bankruptcy
  • Battled alcoholism
  • Got sober
  • Relapsed
  • Got and stayed sober for good
  • Got divorced while learning to be sober
  • Started life all over with no money
  • 2020 COVID pandemic and now…

…here we are.

What do I have to show for it?

I have my sobriety, my mind, my body, my spirit, and, most importantly, my son.

Where did it all begin?

When my mom died.

I know that might seem morbid, but it’s literally just the truth. My mother’s death was the catalyst that forced me to change everything in my life in order to start becoming who I was meant to be for myself and my son.

This is my story of change. Would I prefer that my mom was here and I got to watch her and my son playing together? 

Hell yes, but that’s not part of my story. I railed against that truth for a very long time, but once I released a hold on a future that I thought was intended for me that is when life started to truly change for the better.

Learn from my story. 

Don’t wait for life to force you to change, but change nonetheless. Even if you think you have it all figured out, remember that life is a marathon and not a sprint. 

Becoming who you are meant to be takes a lifetime. It has to start somewhere, somehow and sometime. 

Do you have the courage to look within you and find what needs to shift in order to become who you are meant to be?

If so, what is one thing you can change starting today that will move you in that direction?

don't wait for life

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